Wow!

A lot has happened recently. Sorry about not posting lately...once again, a lot has happened.

I have lost some people, gained some, made some decisions, forgotten some stuff. Become overly happy with my life. Yeah, alot.

So, first I will start with my biggest, and most thought out, decision. In approximately seven months...and seventeen days, I will sign with the United States Navy for a five year contract. I have decided that this is the best route for me for numerous reasons. I figured out that in order to become a PR specialist and a war journalist, my best route is to join a military branch. Me being me, chose the Navy. I am greatly excited and very,very nervous. But feel that I am completely ready for anything the Navy may throw at me. I am ready to go to basic training at Great Lakes for 2 months, and then to proceed to a 6 month training in Fort Meade, Maryland. I am ready. For anything. I will become a Mass Communications Specialist. Doing photo journalism, video journalism, graphic design/editing, as well as website design...I will learn all of this in Maryland. I can honestly say that the worst part about basic will be cutting off my Red Bull; That's why my best friend, Nate, will bring me a 24 pack of the good stuff at my graduation. I feel as though I am destined to do some duty to my country, and I feel that joining the Navy, even if it is just for one contract, will suffice my internal need to represent and defend this great nation.

I broke up with my boyfriend. That was tough, but needed. That was a whole thing with interpersonal issues. Regardless, that affected me a bit. But I mostly needed that. I work best as my own person when it comes to personal life.

Ever since I made my decision to sign with the Navy, I have been very happy. Extremely happy. I feel as though a huge weight has been lifted off my shoulders and that I don't have as much worries anymore. I only have to worry about my ASVAB scores now. I have to achieve a 110 in two selected areas. On my first practice test, I got a 180. On my second test, I received a 190. Oddly enough, you need a 190 in order to do my brother's job. Exciting,no?

Speaking of my brother... Him and I are basically stopping our relationship and friendship. Given the fact that he is the only person to not offer some sort of advice with this vital decision, I also have attempted to speak with him about random stuff, but I haven't talked with him since Christmas. Therefore, I am done with him. We may be brothers, but we don't have to be friends. Although this was a tough decision, it had to be done.

I guess not alot of stuff has happened lately, or maybe it just feels it to me. I guess. I don't know. Once again, I love see y'all's ideas and comments towards my life, so please do leave something...even if it is a "Military sucks"; Yes, I have already received negative comments towards my decision...too damn bad to them. I love my country, I don't care what other people think.

Christopher

A shweet way to end Christmas...or not.

Sorry I haven't updated recently. Life has gotten busy. School stuff, a boyfriend, and a car accident. On Christmas Day night, I was leaving my grandmother's house in a rural town called Jordan. In New York obviously. A tough road in the day time if you have never driven it. I was driving at night, and icy. I saw an animal severed, almost went head on into a guard rail in

Jordan, you can't always be sure what is beyond the guard rail, and turned the car enough to align me for a head on collision with a hillside. I did indeed go head on into the hill, and ricochet back out.

After I got a hold of my father, we pulled the car to the side of the road and called up AAA. I don't care how much of a man you think you are, you will break down when you see your mother after your first major accident. As I waited for AAA with my father, my mother arrived from my house, about 40 minutes away, she got there in twenty. As my mother pulled up and rolled down her window, I broke down when I saw her eyes. I could just see how scared she was. It was the worst feeling in the world to see my mother like that. It was...bad.

After I got back to my grandmother's house, and I was calming down, my broth

er, Drew, called. Asking me how I was and such. And that was when it hit me, the only person that would be able to truly calm me down was half around the world. Rob later called me about three days later and told me "Dude, you fucked up your first car!" Hearing that was probably the most comforting thing I had heard all week. Just because I knew that he was really caring.

Post accident

Although this was all a really bad incident, I did get a new car. A new Subaru Outback. After the accident, I will never buy a non- Subaru car. Never. The AAA guy said the only reason that I was okay was because of how Subaru makes their cars...extremely safe and solid. Herego, only Subaru for me.

Here's my new car (:

I miss you.

I would like to dedicate this post to my brother, Rob. Rob is in Korea serving the great United States Navy. I will never forget all of the whacked up things him and I have done and will do in the future. I always know that he loves me,even if he won't admit it, and that he would do anything for me.

I never realized how much I miss him until my accident on Christmas Day, to be written about soon, and I wanted to call him so badly but I couldn't. I knew that he would be able to calm me down, even if it involved some screaming. Oh well, at that point, after the accident, I realized that I miss my brother. A lot. He's my only true brother, the only guy that I can go to with anything and expect a straight, sometimes unwanted, true response. I really want to be able to see him, but the Navy has a thing against that when they are in Korea, so that won't happen soon.

My brother is one of the greatest people that I know. He's dependable, trustworthy, able to shoot you dead-on your nose, yet caring. All I know is that if I had to name one person that I would be able to talk to for the rest of my life, it would be him. Even though he may not always say it, I know he misses and loves me, I think he knows it too. It feels odd, I am going to be his best man in his wedding next year; I kinda don't want to have to see him become a married man, I feel like he will be so grown up, I mean he is four years older, but still.

Anywho, this was my post to my brother. The one best friend that will never,ever leave me. I don't know if he reads this blog, but if he happens to read this, well he knows how much I miss him.

Man Love.

Recently, my good friend Sam used this picture in one of his posts:

Sam's post.

I love this picture, he does too. And not because it's two guys holding each other, well yeah sorta. It's because it shows that even the most manliest men love each other. We do. You may not want to admit it, but we all have cuddled with our dude friends regardless of sexual orientation of either party. I have. I have pretty much done this same exact "position" numerous times. Nate and I have cuddled numerous times. Not because he's gay but because we love each other. And we are always there when the other one needs some one to lean on...or sleep on. Either or. It's love...man love.

This picture hits me really hard. Verge of crying here. Because it reminds me of my brother and I. I am particullary sensitive about my him right now, he just flew off to fight in Korea. This is a wee bit off topic, but I am going with it. When it comes to my brother, I am really emotional. He is the only person on this entire planet that I am the most gentically identical to. He is my brother. My only brother. I love him. I am going to miss him. Whenever my brother gets restationed, I fall. I fall hard. Even when he gets moved internally. It takes a few days to hit me, but it will. And I will be crying like a 5 year old kid that couldn't get candy. Honestly, Nate is the only person that can at least attempt to help me once I fall. Usually, it involves a few sessions of cuddling/hugging *see first picture*. Anywho, I am sensitive when it comes to both my real brother, and my chosen brothers.

This is all forms of man love. Because guess what? I love all of my brothers...and I am not afraid to admit that. Love you guys, thank you.